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Avalanche

I have been taking a song writing class. It’s probably one of the most challenging endeavor I have taken on, but I love it. Here is this week’s song. 

sun shine
serene mountain side
adventuring spirit
risks denied

trigger point
no warning signs
my own enemy
trapped in these pines

caught in the flow
overwhelmed by the mass
of this avalanche

rapid fracture
seldom escape
breathless victim
beneath formless shape

caught in the flow
overwhelmed by the mass
of this avalanche
overwhelmed by the mass
of this avalanche

Life as a Single Thirtysomething

Sometimes I think I have my life pretty together and then I have a fella over and he points out that I have a gigantic roach running laps in my kitchen light.

I stood for a moment pondering how to react before turning off the light and pretending it wasn’t there.
I stood for a moment pondering how to react before turning off the light and pretending it wasn’t there.

 

And then I read THIS buzzfeed post and think, My life is Every. Single. One of these. Which is awesome, because pants are totally overrated.

Who Gives a Fuck About the Oxford Comma?

Sometimes I wonder what the world is coming to. Vowels are being lost in the abyss of texting and social media, rappers are taking all kinds of liberty with consonant-symbol substitution and now the Oxford Comma “isn’t necessary?” WHAT MADNESS!

Of course, the Oxford Comma controversy isn’t new. I have been shaking my fist and insisting on its use since it all went down. My fourth graders can’t seem to figure out how to write coherent sentences most of the time but they CAN tell you the exact definition of the OC and how to explain to people why it’s necessary. They even know that it’s not ‘technically’ a rule anymore. Last week during benchmark testing, several raised their hand to inquire whether or not they should be correcting for this controversial comma. It’s those moments that leave me beaming with nerd pride and let me know I’m doing my job. They may continue to spyl wrods whith byzare creetvy, but by God, those kids will ALWAYS put in an Oxford Comma.

Slate posted the following photo on their website with the title: A Case For The Oxford Comma In One Screenshot. I giggled for as long as appropriate for a grammar nerd. Well done, Slate.

 

Blakemonster

Flowers were delivered to me at work today. Who are they from?? my excited coworkers asked. I don’t know! I told them. It’s not my birthday. So I reached into the giant arrangement of decadent smelling pink lilies and tore open the card. It read, “See you soon Sis!” and was signed, Blakemonster, which is what I have called my brother for as long as I can remember. And today he sent me flowers because he knew I could use them. I am so. damn. lucky.

Spiritual Solstice

The night it happened, I called my mom. I told her what happened and I sobbed. I sobbed and she listened and instead of telling me that I would be all right, she told me how sorry she was and that I should keep on crying. Keep on crying, she said, until you’re ready not to cry anymore. So I did. I didn’t need to be told that everything was going to be all right. Metaphorical heartbreak only feels fatal. But I did need to be told that feeling as broken and empty and helpless as I did was ok. And she told me that it was, and I believed her.

I love this time of year, not just for the carols and decking of halls, but because it is a time of year when we recognize and embrace the darkness. The days are shorter, the nights longer and we light candles to remind ourselves that the light, physically, mentally and spiritually, is just around the corner.  Darkness is ok. It is ok sometimes to be broken and empty and helpless because it will never last forever.

This morning I woke up feeling more like myself than I have in a long time. I feel fuller and a little bit pieced back together. I ran into one of my surrogate Austin mom’s and she said I seem to have my spark back and I feel it. A little bit. It feels good.

I am glad for the people who remind that even warriors can cry, but it feels good to see that the light is just around the corner. I’m ready to be back to myself again.